Mall Endurance Test: FAIL

Today I decided to boldly go where this mom has not gone for several months..... the mall. I desperately need new jeans and also have recently had the nagging suspician that I am completely devoid of style. I decided that I owe it to myself to update the wardrobe a bit and got motivated to go try on some clothes and come home with some cute stuff.

Going to the mall with a three year old is no easy task. Well, sure, I can GO to the mall- but actually accomplishing any shopping is no easy task at all. In all fairness, I have to give my little girl due credit for being a trooper for the boring trip over to Macy's for a return and then the boring watching Mommy choose and try on jeans... and then the extraordinarily boring paying for said jeans and then (here is where things took a turn for the worst) hopping over to Baby Gap to return some stuff that was bought online....That return process was timely, since a couple of the items were missing their packing slips and were beyond the allowed return period. I try so hard to maintain my composure, to have limitless patience (because the alternative is to lose my patience, which I avoid doing in public!), and to find ways to keep Emma happy and entertained while we are doing things that she finds boring. Eila began to fuss while I stood at the Baby Gap counter, which added to my stress level. Emma kept running to hide from me in the little nooks and crannies of the store, and then decided to hold onto a display rack and spin around it in circles and circles and circles and circles.... until she made me completely dizzy just watching her. I felt tense. We had been to several stores and I had been actively exercising my patience. I am a quiet person who prefers to be anonymous while out and about, but she makes that completely impossible.

After the task of shopping was completed, we went to the mall playground. Eila was asleep in her stroller, so I needed to go and sit with her just outside of the playground at the parent seating area. I briefed Emma on the rules, which included not climbing up the slide- totally standard, a normal rule that she knows she is to follow. The first thing Emma did when she ran into the play area was start to climb up the slide. Several little ones crashed into her. I leaned over the wall and yelled to her several times, and when I finally got her attention I motioned for her to come to me. When she looked right at me and then ignored me and began to climb back up the slide, I reacted. I went into the play area, scooped her up, and we left. She had an absolute freak out. I was mortified, but also completely fed up. I can't take her defiance sometimes! I should not have to repeat myself 10 times in order for her to listen to me. It's unacceptable, and I had to react. I feel disappointed that she didn't get to have a fun time playing. I feel so frustrated, like where has my sweet little Emma gone? She is constantly defiant, argumentative, and just generally unpleasant to be around these days. I really hope this phase is a quick one. She has always been such a good girl, I hardly know how to react when she is deliberately naughty.